I've had a lot more time to teach my dog Harpo to expect a reward when I use sarcasm on him. He often sits up like a real boy when I say it. Or when he wants attention.
I wrote this haiku ten years ago
Harpo has leaned that
We don't love you AT ALL means
that he gets chicken soon
lyrics
What do you think that you're getting little dog?
You're short and you're hairy and you drool.
I never give you anything at all
Just let your hope die now, you thumbless fool.
Don't you know
We don't love you at all
You poor neglected puppy
I think I'll eat all of your treats myself
We don't love you at all
Stop wagging like I'm lying
You get nothing because we are just the worst.
Don't you know that chicken's just for humans?
I know you would just hate it if you tried.
You think you would enjoy what is in this pan
Don't get ideas when I set some aside.
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