Can I interest you in a swing set
Can I interest you in a new ball
Maybe you can find some things that
You might like at the Four Seasons Mall
Or wherever the elves have been shopping this year
To help Santa fill up his sack
He wants to fill you with holiday cheer
But all that you’ll ask for is crackers
We’ve been so excited for our first toddler Christmas
But all she’ll let us buy for her is Wheat Thins and Triscuits
Can I interest you in a cheddar
Can I interest you in a gruyere
Maybe you’d like to sample some feta
Maybe you’d like a grape juice to pair
Or whatever a sommelier would recommend
We place at the top of your stack
Of teetering, tottering, seemingly endlessly
Growing assortment of crackers
We’ve been so excited for our first toddler Christmas
But all she’ll let us buy for her are cheese, wine, and Triscuits
Some day we’ll teach you that Christmas is less about
Getting your favorite stuff
Crackers are wonderful, no one denies it
But Christmas is more about love
We’ve been so excited for our first toddler Christmas
Where in exchange for crackers, we get
Tiny toddler kisses
We’ve been so excited for our first toddler Christmas
And all we’d ever ask of her are tiny toddler kisses
And big toddler kisses
Big, juicy, wet toddler kisses
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